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Category Archives: Gym Rat

It’s the first Monday of the year. I had a nice, if short, vacation. I was rested and ready for the new year. Despite the cold, I was ready for the gym this morning. It’s cardio day. I’m going to get all hot and sweaty. Then I’m going to take a shower, get dressed, and head to work. Does anyone thing I’d be writing were it really that uncomplicated?

I arrive at the gym just after the doors were unlocked — 0600. There’s a sign on the men’s locker room door about the hot water being partially fixed — didn’t know it was broken — and running out quickly. Okay, but I’ll be out of here before that happens. Um, not so much. I figured that worst case scenario would be the tepid stuff, but I wasn’t even really considering that. I was thinking more that I’d rush through the shower with it cooler than I usually do and save some hot water for the next person. Yeah. The best laid plans of mice and men. I worked out as typical. Got a major sweat going. Hit the locker room. Good, someone else was in the shower. He’s got the hot water flowing from New Albany — or is it Sellersburg?

Apparently he didn’t get hot water either. No hot water. Nada. Nope. Changed stalls just in case. Still a freaking freeze out. I’m standing there doing my very best to take a sponge bath in a shower that’s all but spraying ice.  Seriously, two degrees colder, and I would have had sleet in the stall. I kid you not. So I survived — looked like a friggin’ Ken doll to boot. This afternoon there was a sign on the door saying there’s NO hot water. Guess, I’ll be skipping tomorrow morning. I will, however, go by in the afternoon, and if there’s room to use any of the machines, I’ll go for it. Might even take a shower if the hot water’s fixed.

As much as I enjoy running along the river in the early morning hours, I’ve been inside the gym lately. It’s been too cold to be outside, and even on these warmer mornings we’ve been having, I figure I might as well get used to being inside until sometime in March or April. Plus, I’m lifting more. When I’m away from the cable pulls, dumbbells, and plates I forget how much I totally enjoy pulling on the lifting gloves and moving a few tons around before I start my work day.

There’s another advantage as well. There are other people. And lately there are some really hunky, compact guys who are shorter than me — a fetish pleaser if ever there was one. I suppose it was a little obvious that I was interested when I damned near walked into a one of the bright purple ceiling support columns watching him walk. Yeah, Jack’s back in the high life.

I’m the guy3
who dances on the bar –
the little boy
who blows his allowance on comics
and  the man
who can make the phone call to ask you out

I’m the gym rat
lifting a few tons a set –
the epicurean
with a hearty appetite
and the sound sleeper
protecting you through the night

I’m the knight errant
who knows the rules –
the rebel
who breaks them
and the courtier
passionately in love

When I work out I wear a bandanna tied around my head doo rag fashion. It absorbs a good bit of sweat and keeps me from carrying a towel around — especially when lifting. Sometimes during cardio, it will hold so much of the sweat in that I can wring it out when I’m finished. I know. Locker rooms can be quite disgusting.

This morning I while folding laundry I lay my assortment of bandannas on the table and began to wonder if anyone in the washateria knew the old hanky codes. While they haven’t been popular in twenty years, there are still some men who color code their back pockets and flag left or right. The good thing is that if you’ve memorized the code (and there are variations) you know what you’re in for — unless he’s confused. I don’t know how many men have actually been set afire and pissed on to be put out (cf. Some Men), but open times are, typically far less confusing and hopefully less dangerous.

I put a common set of hanky codes below. As I said, it’s a rare occasion to see the codes used these days, but it’s a nice but of gay lore. For the record there are also beard codes (typically used by Bears) and Twink codes.

COLOR WORN ON LEFT WORN ON RIGHT
BLACK heavy SM top heavy SM bottom
GREY bondage top fit to be tied!
BLUE, Light wants head cocksucker
BLUE, Robin’s Egg 69er anything but 69ing
BLUE, Medium cop copsucker
BLUE, Navy fucker (top) fuckee (bottom)
BLUE, Airforce pilot/flight attendant likes flyboys
BLUE, Light w/WHITE Stripe sailor lookin’ for salty seamen
BLUE, Teal cock & ball torturer cock & ball torturee
RED fist fucker fist fuckee
MAROON cuts bleeds
RED, Dark 2-handed fister 2-handed fistee
PINK, Light dildo fucker dildo fuckee
PINK, Dark tit torturer tit torturee
MAUVE into navel worshippers has a navel fetish
MAGENTA suck my pits armpit freak
PURPLE piercer piercee
LAVENDER likes drag queens drag queen
YELLOW pisser/WS piss freak
YELLOW, Pale spits drool crazy
MUSTARD hung 8″+ wants 8″+
GOLD two looking for one one looking for two
ORANGE anything anytime nothing now (just cruising)
APRICOT two tons o’ fun chubby chaser
CORAL suck my toes shrimper (sucks toes)
RUST a cowboy a cowboy’s horse
FUSCHIA spanker spankee
GREEN, Kelly hustler (for rent) john (looking to buy)
GREEN, Hunter daddy orphan boy looking for daddy
OLIVE DRAB military top military bottom
GREEN, Lime dines off tricks (food) dinner plate (will buy dinner)
BEIGE rimmer rimmee
BROWN scat top scat bottom
BROWN LACE uncut likes uncut
BROWN SATIN cut likes cut
CHARCOAL latex fetish top latex fetish bottom
GREY FLANNEL owns a suit likes men in suits
WHITE beat my meat (J/O) I’ll do us both (J/O)
HOLSTEIN milker milkee
CREAM cums in condoms sucks cum out of condoms
BLACK w/WHITE Check safe sex top safe sex bottom
RED w/WHITE Stripe shaver shavee
RED w/BLACK Stripe furry bear likes bears
WHITE LACE likes white bottoms likes white tops
BLACK w/WHITE Stripe  likes black bottoms  likes black tops
BROWN w/WHITE Stripe likes latino bottoms likes latino tops
YELLOW w/WHITE Stripe likes asian bottoms likes asian tops
BLUE, Light w/WHITE Dots likes white suckers likes to suck whites
BLUE, Light w/BLACK Dots likes black suckers likes to suck blacks
BLUE, Light w/BROWN Dots likes latino suckers likes to suck latinos
BLUE, Light w/YELLOW Dots likes asian suckers likes to suck asians
RED/WHITE GINGHAM park sex top park sex bottom
BROWN CORDUROY headmaster student
PAISLEY wears boxer shorts likes boxer shorts
FUR bestialist top bestialist bottom
GOLD LAME likes muscleboy bottoms likes muscleboy tops
SILVER LAME starfucker celebrity
BLACK VELVET has/takes videos will perform for the camera
WHITE VELVET voyeur (likes to watch) will put on a show
LEOPARD has tattoos likes tattoos
TAN smokes cigars likes cigars
TEDDY BEAR cuddler cuddlee
KEWPIE DOLL chicken (under-aged) chicken hawk (likes young adolescents)
DIRTY JOCKSTRAP wears a dirty jock sucks dirty jocks clean
DOILY tearoom top (pours) tearoom bottom (drinks)
MOSQUITO NETTING outdoor sex top outdoor sex bottom
ZIPLOC BAG has drugs looking for drugs
COCKTAIL NAPKIN bartender bar groupie
KLEENEX stinks sniffs
KEYS IN FRONT has a car looking for a ride
KEYS IN BACK has a home needs a place to stay
HOUNDSTOOTH likes to nibble willing to be bitten
UNION JACK skinhead top skinhead bottom
CALICO new in town tourists welcome
TERRYCLOTH bathhouse top bathhouse bottom
WHITE w/MULTICOLOR Dots hosting an orgy looking for an orgy

Men’s Health makes it sound easy in the How To: ”Stand holding two weight plates together, smooth sides out, close to your chest. Your fingers should point forward. Squeezing the plates, extend your arms straight out in front of you. Pause, then return to the starting position. Start with four sets of eight reps.” This little exercise works: chest, biceps, shoulders, abs, and strengthens your grip — which according to some study or other helps reduce high blood pressure (to which I’m genetically linked).

So, I tried it — alternating with sets of forearm curls (15# dumbbell). I started with 5# plates and moved to 10#. The 20# is a little light for me, but I’ll stick with it until I get the form down better. I has done some serious chest and back work already along with triceips and biceps work on the cable cross. It’s amazing to watch the pin work down the weight stack on the fly machine. Of course, it’s also interesting to watch the number of reps go up before the pin moves down. Having said that,  I’m going to have to get back to the abs routine that I’ve been slack on. Russian twists just sound kinda sexy.

Deltoid

I don’t think I’ve talked much about how much I’m coming to enjoy the cross cable machines at the gym. They give me more freedom and varietythan the fixed range machines, they offer better balance training as a positive side-effect, and I’m more comfortable with them than with free weights. Now my biceps, triceps, lats, and delts have that wonderfully worked feeling. After talking to the trainer, I have some exercises for my brachioradialis to strengthen them — especially the left that hurts during lat pulldowns.

I think that instead of becoming a gym rat, I am one.

 

I’m at the gym this afternoon, and as I’m coming up to the cable machine, I noticed my calves in the mirror. I’m completely out of balance — as far as ink goes. So I’m toying with, in the not overly distant future, getting a tribal wolf done over the kanji on my left calf. I’m looking on line now, and I’ve found something I’m interested in. The kangi means dragon, and was always really intended to have a wolf (in some form or fashion) put with it. Some guys are into sleeves. I’m into…whatever name you choose to put on it.

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